Friday and Monday

I know.. I know.. I totally forgot to blog on Friday but I had good reason. I was so swamped at work, I could not even see straight. It sucked to be perfectly honest..

Anyway.. All last week after softball Monday Tina asked me and actually made me promise not to exercise so I was a good girl all week and then Friday was able to play racquetball. Boy talk about making a difference. Really making a difference. I won two of the three games I played..

Then on Sat. I did a 51 mile bike ride, in 3 hours and 13 minutes. Yeah that means that while taking the time off my body felt better then it has and I did well on my own. Didn't need to worry about Tina and losing time.

My biggest fear is that I will disappoint her on the STP. She is so slender and much better shape then I am. You ask how that is possible with playing 6 hours of softball and hour of racquetball a week, and it comes down to the fact that she has always been slender and tall and I am short and stocky.. Sucks to be honest.

She is so fast on the straight, and it use to be that I could at least take her on the hills. Not any longer. In a short amount of time she started to pass me and now.. I can say without a shadow of doubt she passes me with no issue at all and I am still my slow slug pace up the hill. Sucks.. It hurts my ego beyond words. I have not said much to her how bad that hurts but man it stinks to be totally honest. I mean.. I am so darn proud of her, and how she has taken to cycling and how much she loves it and how much she has improved in a years time but.. It hurts to know that I am not getting faster, slower if nothing else.. And that hurts the side of me that felt that this was the sport for me. I would never trade in the pleasure I have had watching her ride, learning new things and just feeling the passion for it. I am so darn proud and happy she found something that challenges all of her being.

I am competitive, I wont say I am not. But I really do pride myself on being good at things, and practicing to become better. Softball, football and cycling.. Those are my passions but.. I have to admit, it hurts when I don't see much improvement in cycling. I see it in the others.. But not cycling. Still slow .. And that adds to my fear that I will slow her down come July and the STP.

So that is where I am at currently.. Worried and stressed that I will not be much help to her on the ride and I will.. Fail her.

So the status check of the day is as follows.

Body: tender but good
Soul: scared
Spirit: worried


Lets see what the day brings and if tomorrow is better.